you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Randomize