it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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