and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize
