quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
This is classic penis vs brain.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
