So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Randomize
