Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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