I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Randomize
