I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
