I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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