How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
