please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
