Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
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