Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
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You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
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Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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