my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
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