i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize