in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Say something about gay babies.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
