Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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