i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
