I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Randomize