How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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