so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
So many bounce houses so little time
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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