I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
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