Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
