I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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