Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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