I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
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For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
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She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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