Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
