i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
