Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Randomize
