as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
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