Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize