I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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