I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Who died my cat blue again?
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
