Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
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