That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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