so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
