it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Randomize