So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize