Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Randomize
