yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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