girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
