party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
