How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
