Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
