i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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