yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize