Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize