i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize