But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
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Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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