it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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