2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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